'POSE’S' HAILIE SAHAR ON WOMANHOOD, STORYTELLING AND OWNING YOUR NARRATIVE
INTERVIEW BY IRVIN RIVERA
On TV, actress HAILIE SAHAR brilliantly plays the effervescent, poised yet feisty Miss Lulu from POSE. When it dropped, POSE made television history for featuring the largest transgender cast ever for a scripted series.
As a daughter, an actress, a storyteller and a woman of trans experience, Hailie Sahar’s journey is inspirational and educational at the same time.
PHOTOGRAPHER: IRVIN RIVERA
DRESS: SÉBASTIEN LUKE
From growing up in a religious household in Los Angeles with a preacher father to transitioning, to being the youngest house mother in Los Angeles, to ballroom, to acting- Sahar has been consistently using her voice and her platform to spread self-love, educate the audience further about the trans community, and in finding and accepting your authentic self.
Aside from POSE, Hailie can also be seen in Good Trouble, Mr Robot, East Siders, Transparent, Disclosure (Documentary) and more.
In this exclusive interview actress Hailie Sahar spoke to us about finding yourself, owning your truths, POSE, her relationship with her mom, her dream project, her notes on representation and visibility, and being a storyteller.
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Top:VASSILIS ZOULIAS
If you were a book, what book would you be and why?
I would be the book of mystery because I'm layered with many depths and once you peel back one layer, there's always more to learn.
If you will have your best-selling book, what would the narrative be? How will you summarize it?
My best-selling book- the narrative would be discovering yourself, living your truth, and enjoying your existence. It will be very simple but powerful.
You are very powerful. Your story is very powerful.
Thank you.
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RIGHT: Cape: MALAN BRETON Shoes: JEFFREY CAMPBELL
And we really love your stories and how you share your truth not just with the LGBTQ community, but also with the audience watching you. How important is visibility and awareness for you?
Visibility is important. I think without seeing yourself, you don't know the possibilities of life. And so I know for me growing up, there wasn't any visibility of a person who was trans-identified and also multiracial. And so knowing that I'm able to be visible now to help a little girl or boy to believe in themselves and know that it's possible, it's very, very important.
How are we as a community, in terms of educating ourselves about the trans community in general?
I think that we are beginning to have the conversation. It’s kind of difficult for me answering this question because I am completely in alignment with myself, and understanding gender barriers. And, I feel that people are not caught up just yet. So for me existing in this world, sometimes it's challenging. It's almost like I'm in a class and I'm ahead of the class, or people like me are ahead of the class, but we have to stop and wait for the rest of the class to learn the lesson about the simplicities of life, accepting each other, and just being your authentic self.
Hat: GRAHAM CRUZ, Gloves and Ankle Cuffs: THALE BLANC, Top and Skirt: SORAPOL LONDON, Shoes: PUBLIC DESIRE
Where do you think people can start if they want to learn more?
I think starting starts within yourself. There's a humanizing quality that we lose with all these different labels in trying to see the differences rather than seeing the similarities that we have. So I think just looking at yourself and knowing that you're a human being, as am I, as is everyone else walking this planet, and then remembering that, you know, life is not forever, and time is short. And so starting from there, I think is the best way of understanding anybody whether you're a person of trans identity or not.
As artists, what can we do to further increase the awareness about the things that are happening, especially the deaths of trans men and women worldwide?
Well, the beautiful thing about us artists is that we are storytellers. Whether that is on camera, whether that is behind the camera, makeup chair, hairstylist, we're storytellers and so we have a due diligence to do to spread awareness, to change the narrative of what we've seen before. So we have a very strong position in this earth.
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Speaking of storytelling, you always include your mom whenever you do interviews and stories. So how influential is your mother in your life?
My mother is my blueprint to womanhood. My mother exemplifies class and elegance and tenacity. I watched my mother growing up and so a lot of my qualities of being classy and taking myself seriously, making others take me seriously, that all comes from my mother. Of course, I've also been influenced by other artists like Janet Jackson. But my mom, I would say is the blueprint of how I model myself.
You became a house mother at such an early age. How was that?
How was that? That was interesting. I was the youngest mother in LA that I knew of. And so a lot of the kids in the house bucked my authority. They didn't really listen to me because I was younger than them. But it was an experience. It really made me want to be more in alignment with myself and take things more seriously. Once I knew people were falling behind me, I wanted to make sure my “t's” were crossed and my “i’s” were dotted. So it was an eye opener for me.
Dress: SÉBASTIEN LUKE, Shoes: CULT OF COQUETTE
Are you still part of the house?
Not currently. I'm not a part of a house. But I think that what I've done now is I've taken the things that I've learned from ballroom and in my everyday life, whether that be a lesson from my mother or just my own personal experiences. I've taken that and now I've taken it mainstream, which has always been my goal. And, I've always wanted to use my voice to give back. And so now I've taken my message more mainstream to reach not only the community of LGBT+ but also the world in general.
You know, when I’m watching your interviews, the main takeaway that really struck me was when you said that you found God and love inside you. And that was really powerful. How was it? Like when you first felt that?
How was it? I was about 13. I think I was 13 or 14. I was a little depressed growing up for some of the obvious reasons, not feeling comfortable in my own skin, amongst other things. And I remember, you know I was kind of sheltered too. So I was always indoors. I was also a very shy person. So I had dance to lean on and I remember I was doing this rehearsal piece in my room, and I just broke out in tears. And it was that moment that I realized dance and art was my escapism. And I realized that through my artistry, God speaks to me. That is when I felt the most alive and I felt just that. I felt alive for the first time. It was a beautiful feeling and there's nothing more powerful than that for me.
LEFT: Hat: GRAHAM CRUZ, Gloves and Ankle Cuffs: THALE BLANC, Top and Skirt: SORAPOL LONDON, Shoes: PUBLIC DESIRE
RIGHT: Top and Leggings: ALEJANDRO COLLECTION Jacket: ROCKY GATHERCOLE Bodysuit: ROCKY GATHERCOLE Earrings: BALENCIAGA via OLA STUDIO Shoes: CULT OF COQUETTE
Let’s talk about POSE and Miss Lulu. How would you characterize Miss Lulu’s evolution throughout the season so far?
Lulu’s evolution to me is central and mysterious. She moves to me like a lioness. She hunts and stalks and you don't know what she's doing next. But she eventually pounces on you and I find her to be very intriguing. Because, I have to peel back the many layers of Lulu's personality which is fun for me as an artist. And playing Lulu, I've gained a better respect for my artistry. Not fully knowing my character, but discovering my character and her having many layers where sometimes I'm playing a more bold part of Lulu, and sometimes I'm playing a more subdued version of Lulu. It's been a good challenge for me as an artist.
How much Lulu is in Hailie and how much Hailie is in Lulu?
I think Lulu is in a lot of everybody. I don't think anyone's one way. I think it depends on the situation you're in or who you're dealing with. I think some moments we are feistier, some moments we’re more subtle. I relate to Lulu in that way. I can be a little reserved. But if you put me in front of a camera, and you put me in front of an audience, I am a firecracker. So I think it just depends on you know who you're dealing with in life, but I think we all share those qualities of Lulu and that's why I love her too.
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RIGHT: Full Look: ROCKY GATHERCOLE Frames and Nails: LAURA ESTRADA Gold Necklace: THALE BLANC Pearl Choker: VIVENNE WESTWOOD Shoes: JEFFREY CAMPBELL Earrings: 21HM
Of all the characters that you’ve played, is there a specific one that resonated with you the most?
Well, all of the characters I played I think have been different versions of me to some degree. So I can't say that there's one particularly. Of course Lulu is a very fun character. It takes place in 1980s and 90s. And so that's always fun to do a time period piece. But also Jasmine on Good Trouble is really fun for me. I think all the characters I've taken something away and when I've been done with the scripts, I've learned something about myself and it feels like I've evolved a little bit more in my personal life. So I appreciate all of them for what they bring to me.
Dream project?
Well, I say this a lot. I want to be a Bond girl because I love classic things and I love dangerous things and I've never shied away from sexuality. I love being sexy. I love the danger, I love the mystery and James Bond. But I also want to play something from 1800s. I love time period pieces. And I would love to play something dealing with mental disorders. That would be really fun for me to do and something that would be very educational for me as well. And I want to dissect that. I think that a lot of people are always constantly misunderstood that have situations dealing with mental health. And so I would love to dive into that as well, to understand it better and to help other people understand it as well.
RIGHT: Full Look: ROCKY GATHERCOLE Frames and Nails: LAURA ESTRADA Gold Necklace: THALE BLANC Pearl Choker: VIVENNE WESTWOOD Shoes: JEFFREY CAMPBELL Earrings: 21HM
That's really nice. Hailey, we look forward to it.
Thank you.
I guess my final question would be as a woman of trans experience, what is your stance on whatever is happening in our society right now?
My stance on what's happening right now in society is I'm definitely for all Black Lives Matters. And, I'm for equality for everyone. I am for remembering that time is short on this planet. And just the simplicities that life really has. I think as human beings, something happens when you become an adult, we complicate everything. I think children can be some of the simplest beings and we kind of forget what that's like to just play with our friends, not see color, and not see gender. And so I'm standing for all Black Lives Matters and everyone is equal in my eye, and life is short, so get it together, because we're not gonna be here forever.
